SUPERNATURAL STORIES OR SUPERSTITIONS IN YOUR FAMILY?

     I have been giving genealogy talks and classes for a few (<ahem> let's just leave it at "a few" so that I don't show my age) years now, and I have heard many, many family stories from audience members. The ones I like best are the ghost stories. I have heard a few that sent chills down my spine. I have also heard stories of ancestors with extrasensory gifts, and tales involving family superstitions.
     Having had an Irish grandmother who had the gift of sight, and a Polish grandmother who knew how to banish evil spirits, I value these special family stories. However, I find that many people neglect to include such stories in their family history. But, even the sceptics among us must recognize the value of such stories--they are part of our families' supernatural heritage!
     I recently heard one such spooky tale from a fellow researcher. In 1930, his 78 year old ancestor John was sitting in the dining room with family members. A white mist suddenly formed around the ceiling light. Staring into the mist, John pointed at it and called out his deceased wife's name. The mist moved from the light, floated up the stairs, then disappeared. Within a few hours, John died.
     Luckily for the family, this researcher included the story in his written family history.
     Don't forget to ask family members for such "ghost stories" during your interviews. Inquire into family superstitions, also. Many of our ancestors brought spells and charms with them from their country of origin. In some families, these superstitions were woven into holiday or life event traditions. Perhaps every bride in your family wore a certain charm, or each newborn was given an incantation or blessing?
     Certain holidays bring with them special rituals and foods. New Year's Day, for instance, often involves special foods or practices meant to ensure luck, health, and prosperity in the coming year. Did your family eat certain beans? Did a dark-haired man have to be the first one through the door after the stroke of midnight?
     I watch the movie Silver Linings Playbook this past week. Robert DeNiro plays an Eagles football fan who blames compulsive superstitions for his team's wins and losses. I know plenty of sports fans with special game day rituals. Any in your family?
     I don't throw salt over my shoulder or knock on wood, but I do worry when I hear of two misfortunes or deaths, because such things happen in three's. At least, that's what my Babcia taught me!

TIP FOR ADDING AUDIO TO THOSE OLD SILENT MOVIES

     I have video clips from the "silent era" of home movies from the '50s and '60s. When the old film reels were transferred to VHS tape, the photo labs often added a song track. But there are better ways to add interest and information to old film images. Don't ignore the possibilities of embellishing family films with oral storytelling!
     I have a VHS tape of my cousins telling stories at a family reunion. The images on the tape were beyond my technical powers to save. The audio, however, was not too bad after a bit of tinkering. So, I snatched an audio track on which my cousin describes a family Christmas party, and added it to the video of a 1954 family Christmas party.
     Another great soundtrack idea is to describe the images and scenes yourself, or to have a family member tell a story about what is happening on the video. In this way, the people in the video are identified and the event explained--much like labeling photographs.

PRESERVING ORAL FAMILY HISTORY WITH A MOBILE APP

     What better way to preserve a family story than to hear it told in an ancestor's own voice? If you are interested in an easy way to collect and preserve family stories in your own voice or in the voices of your relatives, check out the resources (and mobile apps!) available from STORYPRESS:
http://www.storypress.com/welcome

ARE YOU A PERSON OF FEW WORDS?

Can you write a memoir or a story in six--yes, only six!--words?

That is the idea behind online Smith Magazine's story project. This storytelling site has some fascinating story projects, including their challenge to readers to write a story in just six words.

http://www.smithmag.net/

My own memoir:

Searching for ancestors. Telling their stories.

THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO FOR YOUR FAMILY

    
"The single most important thing you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative."
     Bruce Feiler, "The Stories that Bind Us." New York Times: March 15, 2013. Fashion and Style.
    In this fascinating piece in the New York Times, author Bruce Feiler describes the Emory University study that found that a child's knowing family stories is the most important factor in developing childhood resiliency and coping skills.  A family narrative provides a child with a place in the family history and with examples of hardships and successes. Feiler identifies three types of family narratives: the ascending narrative (a family starts with nothing and prospers), the descending narrative (the family lost everything), and the oscillating  narrative (we have survived bad times and experienced good times as well). He points to the oscillating narrative as the most helpful to a child because it reveals that a family can stay together through good and bad life experiences.
     Read the article at  http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/17/fashion/the-family-stories-that-bind-us-this-life.html?_r=0
     I think that many of us are afraid we will bore younger generations with family stories. But I believe the Emory study shows that, even if a child seems not to be listening, the core value of a family story works its medicine on his or her development.
     So, tell those stories, even if done in short conversations. Feiler also recommends that families create a mission statement that identifies the family's core values. What an interesting way to develop a sense of belonging and sharing!

SENSITIVE MATERIAL: SWEPT UNDER THE RUG ?

     On Friday, I spoke about collecting and preserving family stories at the National Archives at Philadelphia (NARA Philadelphia). The Archives sponsors a monthly genealogy gathering called First Fridays. Every other month, NARA Philadelphia partners with the Genealogical Society of Pennsylvania to present speakers on genealogy topics.
    As a speaker, I particularly enjoy the "question and answer" period after my talks at NARA Philadelphia. The audiences are usually diverse in their genealogy interests and are very active listeners. This past Friday was no exception.
     Quite a few audience members joined in the discussion of sensitive family stories--the topics of adultery, abandonment, and abuse were raised. I think a few members who thought that they were alone in having dysfunctional family stories derived some comfort in hearing that a good number of other family historians shared such stories.
     Opinion was divided as to the appropriateness of preserving and sharing these stories. Some people felt that they had a duty to preserve the family history, even the more sordid stories. They pointed to the healing effect that openness might have on the living.  Others felt that perhaps certain stories should be kept "swept under the rug," for fear of hurting or offending present and future generations.
     Generally, the crowd seemed to agree that the farther back in time that the events occurred, the easier to advocate sharing the story. Everyone shared a concern for the effects that a sensitive story might have on the living family members.
     When preserving and sharing our family history, dealing with sensitive stories is concern for all of us. Rare is the family without a scandal--just keep digging and a secret will come to light somewhere in every family tree. Whether to keep or exclude a story is an individual decision that requires much thought and sensitivity!
    

KNOWING FAMILY STORIES LEADS TO SUPERIOR COPING SKILLS!

     I have always found comfort in hearing and knowing the stories of my ancestors and family members. I could never figure out why I found these stories so comforting. Now I realize that the stories made me feel as though I was part of a larger narrative--that I had a place in the story and in the larger web of family members. Science now supports my feelings of comfort!
     Researchers have found that the single most important predictor of coping skills in children is knowing their family stories. Children who knew information such as where their grandparents were born or where their parents went to school had better coping skills than children who scored lower on the "do you know" questionnaire.
     Listen to author Bruce Feiler (The Secrets of Happy Families) as he describes the study and the "do you know" game that parents should play with their children: http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/books/2013/02/14/bruce-feiler-happy-families/1919311/